Elder Baddies

Under the wrinkled invisible cloak.

Photo by Stewart Munro on Unsplash

Hey friends,

I’m writing to you on a rainy day, a day late, because yesterday was spent at the AAA office, once again attempting to get the Real ID that I originally applied for in March. When it didn’t arrive, I assumed it was lost in the mail and reordered. But then, when that one didn’t arrive either, I double-checked the receipt and found that even after how insane they were with proving residence, they had put “Street” instead of “Avenue,” which in Brooklyn makes a huge difference. They had me fill out another entire application for a change of address, and then had the gall to ask me to pay a second time. After I flatly refused and waited to speak to a manager, feeling like an absolute Karen, they waived the fee. But then, (yes, there’s even more!) when I got home an hour and a half later, I had a message alerting me that my application had been rejected because I hadn’t properly filled out the form and hadn’t written in my social security number on form MV-44. Reader, I assure you there are no shortcuts to getting through the DMV’s incompetence.

In instances like this, I wish I were past the age that anyone would expect me to cause any real trouble, and be freed from the social contract that holds our society together. Nobody looks closely at that little old woman, and therefore, everyone underestimates her. Historically, older women could be categorized as helpless or witches, nothing in between. This week, I’ve spent some time thinking about the older-lady baddie and the liberation that comes along with society’s rejection of our female elders.

Let’s get into it!

Good Joy, Bad Joy- Mikki Brammer (2026)

Of course, the reason I’ve been thinking about this topic is from reading my friend and friend of the newsletter, Mikki Brammer’s novel starring the octogenarian, Joy Bridport. After a lifetime of being “good,” a good wife, a good mother, a good neighbor, she learns it’s never too late to be “bad.” When her BFF, Hazel, who has always been the adventurous one in the relationship, is diagnosed with late-stage cancer, something in Joy cracks open. Petty crime turns into full-on criminal activity. Brammer delves into the gray area of what it means to be a “good” person, and how important it is for women of any age to take up space in their lives. It’s a life-affirming novel that will make you want to call all the women in your life, especially the older ones.

Harold and Maude (1971)

This was my favorite movie in middle school when, in a goth-punk phase, I fell head over heels with the disillusioned, death-obsessed Harold Chasen, who accidentally embarks on an extreme May-December relationship with an 80-year-old eccentric. She teaches him the joys of life and the importance of self-acceptance at any age. I re-watched the film a few years ago with my son (who was freaked out by the fake suicide attempts at the start of the movie), and the film holds up as an utterly profound experience. Ruth Gordon [see also my other favorite movie, Rosemary’s Baby] is perfectly cast as the free-spirited Maude, who argues everyone “ha[s] the right to make an ass of themselves.”

Havoc- Christopher Bollen (2024)

Christopher Bollen’s Havoc is less interested in warmth and much more interested in the darkness underneath. Eighty-one-year-old Maggie Burkhardt is temporarily living at a luxury hotel in Egypt, just a harmless, kind, meddling, and sometimes murderous old woman. No one knows her capabilities or the mysterious circumstances she ran from in Switzerland. Her biggest enemy is the new eight-year-old who checked in down the hall. This is no Wes Anderson film; instead, it’s a startlingly wicked thriller that will hold you hostage while you read. I’ve recommended this one countless times, most recently in my wrap-up of My Favorite Books of 2024. If you haven’t read it yet, now’s your chance.

Don’t Be A Menace (1996)

I’ll leave you all with this unforgettable scene from Don’t Be A Menace, where two older women have a dance off. Comedies have been turning the little old lady stereotype on its head for comedic effect forever. Remember “Where’s the beef?” But in the current climate, we seem to be rethinking these tropes altogether and recognizing that, beneath the wrinkles, is an actual person who cannot be so easily dismissed, even if society tried hard to ignore them. Senior citizens run our country, start wars, run pedophile rings, engage in insider trading, get convicted of sexual abuse, and destroy our economy. Not so easy to laugh off.

Who’s your favorite elder baddie? Comment below.